TIPS FOR TEACHING KIDS TO DEAL WITH PEER PRESSURE
TIPS FOR TEACHING KIDS TO DEAL WITH PEER PRESSURE
Parenting Through Peer Pressure
Do the words peer pressure fill you with fear? Do they make you think of your child's friends encouraging him or her to engage in wrong, dangerous, or inappropriate behavior? If they do, you're not alone. Today's children and teens experience peer pressure in a variety of ways: positive and negative peer pressure, and personal and cultural peer pressure.Let's identify and discuss the types of peer pressure so you and your child can recognize them and develop strategies for combatting negative pressure.
The Positive Side of Peer Pressure
Some types of peer pressure — such as pressure to do well academically — can be positive influences for your child. Just as pressure from one or more friends can influence a child to engage in wrongdoing, it also can persuade them to avoid trouble and work hard. Your child's group of friends can encourage each other to strive for excellence in areas like:- Trying harder in extracurricular activities
- Getting good grades
- Avoiding classmates who engage in negative behavior
Positive peer pressure is healthy for your child. It might come in the form of personal peer pressure, involving face-to-face contact between your child and one or more other children, or it could be cultural peer pressure from television or the internet.
The Flip Side: Negative Peer Pressure
As a parent, you can help your grade schooler learn to spot the difference between negative and positive peer pressure and whether it is personal or cultural, and teach them when to say "Yes" and when to walk away.Negative personal peer pressure involves face-to-face contact and communication where a person or a group of people tries to convince, tease, bully, or shame another person or group of people into doing something that's against the rules, illegal, dangerous, or morally or ethically wrong.
That sounds simple enough, but children experience peer pressure in more ways than face to face; they also experience it culturally through television, the internet, and social media. Technology brings a whole new kind of impersonal, omnipresent pressure to your grade schooler. This kind of peer pressure tries to tell your child:
Today's parents are faced with a tough challenge: How to maintain your influence in your child's life and teach them to resist negative personal and cultural peer pressure messages.
In addition to spending time with your grade schooler and actively listening when they want to talk, you can teach your child the SODAS method, a process that can help your child solve problems, think more clearly, and make decisions based on sound reasoning. The principles are simple, and the method can be adapted to many situations.
Teaching Activity
Open Discussion on Peer Pressure
At your next family meeting, put the topic of peer pressure on the agenda for an honest, open conversation.
- Invite your children to take the lead in a discussion about peer pressure and how it affects them through their relationships, at school, in the media, or on the internet.
- Ask your kids what they can do and how you can help them avoid or resist peer pressure.
Social Skills
Choosing Appropriate Friends and Resisting Negative Peer Pressure
Choosing Appropriate Friends
One of the most important ways to reduce the dangers of negative peer pressure in your child's life is to help them choose the right friends. Have them consider the following steps:
- Think of the qualities and interests you look for in a friend.
- Look at the strengths and weaknesses of potential friends.
- Match the characteristics of friends with your own values and interests.